Temporary? Insanity

I have two incredibly adorable little girls. I’m not posting a giggly grinning picture of them just to show off the fact though. It was the best way I could think of to start this post…to say how happy and how sad I am that there isn’t a third on the way yet.

We thought that we had had an “oops”…but you know how the home pregnancy tests boast that they’re 99% accurate? Well, it turns out that I’m the 1%.

I feel so special.

The last few days have been difficult. A lot of struggling with conflicting feelings. Neil and I decided to be happy (if a little stressed) about the news. We realized that we’re well able to welcome another child into our home, and that if that’s what Heavenly Father had in store for us, we were prepared to embrace the idea gladly.

Not that there weren’t some tears shed on my part. I had hoped so much that I could overcome my weight issues before having another child, and having all hope of that stripped from me was very difficult.

And now, that hope is restored. I feel some sense of loss and sadness, yes, but for the most part I feel relief and excitment. I’ve been given a second chance. A chance to recommit to good health and all that goes with.

So when baby number three does come along, he or she will be welcomed by a happier, healthier mother. And Emma and Rebecca, my darling girls, will continue to be my ever present sources of motivation.