Bliss Examined
by Kym on November 27, 2007
This past year has been one of struggle, self-awareness, and redefinition. I’ve skimmed through my archives, noticing recurring themes, posts with different titles but similar messages. I’ve learned that happiness is a choice, that being a Mom isn’t enough for me, and that my tendency to be a social hermit makes me miserable.
I tackled all three of those issues yesterday. I had a party. This may seem like a simple thing to do, but the aforementioned social hermit in me? Really freaks out about that kind of thing. But I decided to be happy. And I decided to be me. And as the title of my last post indicates, it was Bliss.
The food table was laden with goodies (which gals went back for thirds of), the basement was strung with white twinkle lights which gave a pretty glow to the room. A heavy snowfall had me certain that no one would come, but three friends braved the weather. Three friends who are much, much closer friends than they were before. Because you can’t help but feel closer after three and a half hours of intense conversation, cheery chatter, and overall hilarity.
My face still feels a wee bit sore after the workout it got last night.
Inhibitions went out the window, and I laughed freely, joined in the conversation with an almost worrying gusto, and even had the delight of letting my quirky sense of humour out to play. And they laughed. At things that I said.
Here, in my blog, I let the full force of my personality shine. In person? I struggle with that. The reason last night was so blissful, is because I managed to do it in real life. And it felt good. And I’m going to do it again.
37 comments
Ah…wish I could have been there. I am glad you had a good party and strenthened friendships.
by Heffalump on November 27, 2007 at 7:23 pm. #
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY
I’m so glad you put yourself out there like that! What a brave thing to do, and it totally worked! Good for you! :)
by Thoroughly Mormon Millie on November 27, 2007 at 7:51 pm. #
I am delurking to tell you how excited I am you had a great time. I crave female companionship – on my own terms. Real friends, not the ones that put on a front so you never truly know that incredible people they are inside.
Keep it up!
by Cheri on November 27, 2007 at 8:37 pm. #
Sounds like a simply marvelous time. I’m glad you let some of the rest of the world see how wonderful you are. It’s not right to hide all that you know.
I completely agree that Happiness is a choice and even though we don’t always choose it, it’s there for us.
by Tonya on November 27, 2007 at 8:53 pm. #
From another social hermit, I am so glad that you had fun. And equally glad that you have friends willing to brave the snow to be there with you! That is the part that scares me the most. Good for you- and your friends.
by Sandra on November 27, 2007 at 9:31 pm. #
I’m happy for you! There’s a lesson in there for many of us.
by Annie on November 27, 2007 at 9:52 pm. #
Oh good! It really is such a joy to be yourself and find that people like you that way.
by Summer on November 27, 2007 at 9:55 pm. #
I’m so glad that you pushed your inhibitions aside and let loose! Hooray for bliss!
by Deanne on November 27, 2007 at 10:01 pm. #
Congrats!! Keep it up!
I am a lot more reserved in groups. I think there must be lots of people who think I am a sand, rational and quiet person. Little do they know that if they came over and talked to me one on one, they’d wish they hadn’t. I am pretty bad at talking people’s ears off!
I’m glad you are figuring yourself out this year and doing something about it!!!
by Tirzah on November 27, 2007 at 10:04 pm. #
Congrats to you! Thatis wonderful. I’m thrilled for you. You describe the scene so well – I can just picture the gal fest, with snow blanketing everything outdoors while you all hoot and holler and laugh. Good stuff.
Also, just email when you can – I look forward to hearing from you but don’t stress over it!
PS
This post sounds a bit like what the last year or so has been like for me, as well.
by Keetha on November 27, 2007 at 10:19 pm. #
sweet!
by newnorth on November 27, 2007 at 10:47 pm. #
bravoooooo!
i’m glad you did that. :)
by holly on November 27, 2007 at 11:46 pm. #
Brava, lady! I wish I could have been there….
by Luisa Perkins on November 28, 2007 at 12:34 am. #
aw, that is wonderful. I wish I could have come to the party! :D
It’s funny, I have a bit of social anxiety too..but it’s the opposite of yours. I get worried that I talk TOO much. Sometimes I’ll be in the middle of a story and just think “oh god, am I being THAT person. The annoying one monopolizing the conversation?” *sigh*
I’m so glad you had a great time.
by ElizabethSheryl on November 28, 2007 at 1:18 am. #
I struggle in the same way, and I love when it works out like that. Good for you!!!
by Deb on November 28, 2007 at 1:56 am. #
I’m glad the party went well!:)
by Kate on November 28, 2007 at 2:23 am. #
I am so thrilled for you! Proud, too! I only wish I could have been there :( !!
by An Ordinary Mom on November 28, 2007 at 2:27 am. #
When I was in high school a friend from school came to a church activity with me. She was shocked to see the side of me that those who know me well see. She said she didn’t realize I was so outgoing. And I had never had that term applied to me before!
It’s hard to put your true self out there when you are face to face with people. Congratulations on doing it in real life!
by mindyluwho on November 28, 2007 at 3:35 am. #
Ditto to what Luisa said.
(And that’s awesome, by the way. You go girl!!!! I’m insanely happy for you and your bliss!)
by Brillig on November 28, 2007 at 3:47 am. #
I’m happy for you Kimberly – I know how anxiety laden things like that can be. I’m very happy you had such a wonderful time!
by Sue on November 28, 2007 at 5:45 am. #
Congratulations! I’m glad that it was a success!! I hope you do have more of them. :)
by Grandy on November 28, 2007 at 6:12 am. #
You go girl!! I should do this… I really should… my problem is that I’m in Enrichment. I plan parties for my calling. Makes me feel a little blah about planning more… but maybe I will anyway!
by Melissa on November 28, 2007 at 6:48 am. #
Woohooooooo! You rock! I’m glad your party went well and that you could feel like yourself, too — that is always a terrific feeling.
by Beth on November 28, 2007 at 1:02 pm. #
good on ya, mate. any party with you there would be bliss, indeed.
by Nic on November 28, 2007 at 1:51 pm. #
okay, except for maybe a social gathering of the oatmeal makers of North America. but we would totally ditch that one together.
by Nic on November 28, 2007 at 1:52 pm. #
Brava!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now come over to my place for a piece of celebratory ricotta pound cake and a chance to win a new dessert cookbook:
Ricotta Pound Cake
:)
by sognatrice on November 28, 2007 at 2:13 pm. #
It’s hard enough to put yourself out there on the internet, but to do it in person takes real guts. So happy for you that you pulled it off.
I bet it gets easier each time, too. Face your fears. That’s my motto lately. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.
It obviously worked for you. Yay!
by The Rotten Correspondent on November 28, 2007 at 3:37 pm. #
Sometimes I feel like a broken record, but I have to say again, that I can really relate to this post. This past summer has been one of intense change for me as well. I too, have realized that staying “safely” inside as a hermit, “just” being a mom, is making me very depressed. But at the same time the level of anxiety I feel when trying to talk to an acquaintance is enough to kill me. I’ve gotten up the courage to call some people from my ward to come over for fhe, but they had previous plans. I need to try again, but it’s so nerve-wracking.
You are so brave to tackle it head on like that. Host a party? I think I might have a anxiety attack. Oh, but the feeling you describe, it must have been, well, bliss.
by Meisha on November 28, 2007 at 5:28 pm. #
I can almost see the fun! I love having girls night, but the actually getting out or planning anything is stressful. I identify with you a lot. Although with me, I do say things now and then and have my opinions, but my quirky side doesn’t come out in a large group.
by Rebecca on November 28, 2007 at 7:16 pm. #
I’m so happy for you! Sounds like a memorable evening. Hooray!
by bmg on November 28, 2007 at 8:38 pm. #
Three cheers for you!!!! Happiness is definitely a choice and and I wish I knew why we sometimes struggle with choosing it.
by Yvonne on November 28, 2007 at 10:03 pm. #
Yay! Sounds like it was well worth the worry and effort.
Glad you had a great time.
by Lisa Milton on November 29, 2007 at 1:34 am. #
Kim, you’re incredible and totally deserving of bliss eternal. I wish I could have been there.
by Julie Wright on November 29, 2007 at 2:43 pm. #
I think I heard you singing!!
yep, I did
by Jean Knee on November 29, 2007 at 3:01 pm. #
We are so alike. My blog is my true self. The rest? I just make it up as I go along. :)
by That Chick Over There on November 29, 2007 at 7:52 pm. #
Man, I could have really used a party like that! I don’t have those kind of friends here yet…all of my “party” friends are out of state or in blogland. Good for you!
by Jenna on November 30, 2007 at 5:13 am. #
Ahh that sounds so fab. And three sounds perfect. Sometimes if there are more it’s a bit too overwhelming.
I’m out with loads of my ‘mummy’ friends tonight, and my 4 bezzie mates in the whole world tomorrow. I’ve realized through blogging how much I need the genuine friendships that come when there are no other issues i.e. appearance, confidence, attitudes etc. Being yourself in the virtual world and being loved and accepted for it seems to make it that bit easier to step out into the real world and be you.
You’re amazing. So warm and talented and funny and caring. I’m glad more people are getting to see that. They will gain just as much as you do.
Hug. :D
by Jo Beaufoix on November 30, 2007 at 9:06 am. #