There is a piece of chocolate cake in the fridge. I managed not to eat it last night after eating my first piece. I was so strong. I wanted to applaud myself but there are certain of my quirks I don’t want to pass on to my kids so I refrained.
I resisted the tantalizing lure of chocolatey goodness when the urge for an evening snack overwhelmed me. I had a bottle of water instead. I grinned to myself because hey, grins are quiet so I can so get away with that.
At 3am I woke with a full bladder and cursed my brilliant water instead of cake plan. I limited my night roamings to the bathroom and didn’t sneak down to the fridge. I fell asleep, tossing fitfully, hearing the siren call of the lusciously moist and delectable desert that the very thought of apparently expands my vocabulary usage.
It’s still there though. It’s 8:47am and it is still there. Singing to me, its dulcet tones drowning out the monotone humming of the breakfast cereal cupboard.
I tell myself I am strong. And then I laugh at myself for that lie. And then I frown and think, I have got to stop having these inner dialogues before I get locked up or something.
And so I will spend the morning answering the 60 emails in my inbox (umm…yes…sorry about that everyone), trying to busy myself and avoid the inevitable caving in.
Or I may just take the darn piece of cake and huck it off the back deck where it would likely be devoured by a passing squirrel who would probably die from the resultant sugar overdose.
But then, part of me would envy that squirrel.
What a lovely way to go that would be…
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36 Comments
Mmmmm!!!Pass that chocolate cake to me, I have no will-power when it comes to goodies in the frig…I might as well eat it, or someone else will…
Hope you enjoy that yummy cake sometime today;)))
I will not make a snarky comment.
Be strong.
Instead of eating that cake go here and watch this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDfp45Utg5k
laugh really long and hard and get an ab workout instead.
Huck the cake! Do it! do it! I’ve heard squirrels like the extra curves. That’s why they eat all those fatty nuts. In fact, why don’t you sprinkle nuts on top of the cake, then huck it off the deck and make some squirrel really, really happy?
I don’t know that it would be a good way to die…
My sister had a gerbil and fed it chocolate and candy canes, and it got really REALLY fat until it could barely move, and then it died.
Not fun at all.
Do you feel better about the cake now?
My death wish?
I have recurring fantasies of lying on my back and pouring warm chocolate texas sheetcake batter right out of the bowl into my mouth. Mmm. What a way to go!
Your post reminded me of a student film we saw at USC eons ago. This girl was trying against all odds to resist, but this chocolate cake kept calling to her from the fridge…”Eat me. Eat me, Judy!” (It was hilarious. I still like imitating the funny little voice.)
I think hucking the the piece of cake from the deck would be satisfying in itself. Do you have a shotgun handy? Maybe you could have even more fun! And just think–by the time you’ve finished unloading a couple dozen rounds of shotgun shells into the chocolaty goodness, you may have forgotten your craving.
*said in best sports announcer voice*
Well folks, today we have a really exciting match for you. Kimberly versus THECHOCOLATECAKEOFDOOM! Who will win? The plucky newcomer, or the notoriously sadistic cakiness of the champion?
Stay tuned to find out folks . . . this could well be the fight of the century right here . . .
Well I, for one, am proud of you for passing on the cake. I hate having goodies in the house because I too endulge in that second piece. It’s sooo bad but…well you know. So, good for you!!
What’s awful… I really wanted you to eat it… the whole time… why?! Because that’s what I would’ve done. A little bit at a time until there was only a TINY bit of cake that didn’t count as a piece. And then I would’ve eaten that too. Either that, or in the morning I would’ve told myself I got a prize for not eating it the night before, and I would have consumed and told myself I had every right to…
Good for you on standing your ground!
I say give in,but only eat half the slice so can enjoy it AGAIN
later. Then go for a walk to erase the guilt.
That’s my MO;p
Honestly Kim, I am so glad that is over there and not here. I think I couldn’t resist and have that cake.
Man that sounds so good. Great that you are resisting it though. Kudos my friend.
You could huck it or give it away; take away the temptation.
Share it with someone.
Meanwhile, good on you and your self control.
When something calls that loudly, and so sweetly, I usually give in. So, Good for you! But to really really keep myself from eating something, I usually feed it to my kids. Cause they will eat anything will sugar in it. And I get the added bonus of them thinking I am wonderful.
Firstly: YAY! to you for your sustaining will power.
Wow! You have chocolate cake in your fridge? I envy you. I quit baking when Billy and I got married. He didn’t really like sweets (except that Sara Lee frozen crap and Jello) so after the first couple of times I baked brownies or cake I quit. I felt a tiny bit guilty when I ate a whole pan of brownies by myself – I have no will power. And now, I only bake at Christmas time. Even then, we give most of it away! My kids begged me to buy one of those Pilsbury cookie dough rolls. So I did. It’s still in my fridge… I think it’s like a month and a half old – come to think of it… do those things go bad?
Just think about how good you feel. Don’t let the darn piece of cake take that from you!!! You are stronger than the cake. (insert shoulder rubbing here)
I’m very proud of you! And I think it would be a great way for the squirrel to die…but then I don’t particularly like squirrels : )
i was WITH YOU IN SPIRIT today honey! i stared at a piece of chocolate cake in our work fridge. no fewer than five people invited me to have some. 2 people had birthdays on the same day. WTH? (that’s *heck* for you. :))
i stared that thing down. i even told it *you are not the boss of me*. i think it said “awww howwy, don’t you wuv me?” and i said “cake, no, i do not wuv you. you are so mean to me.”
yeah, i think we’re going to get adjoining cells – you with your inner dialogue, and me with my talking to cakes. they asked me to stop it today. i said no.
Oh geez, I would have either devoured that cake or thrown it out. There’s no way I would have let it taunt me all night. Let’s be honest, I would have eaten it. I wouldn’t have been able to throw it out.
Don’t you love how you have such funny people commenting here? They all cheer you, I’m sure :)
They say that you should eat what you crave, get it over with and then not eat other stuff….
so if you crave cake, I guess you eat it… then you starve yourself.
Sound fun?
I kept nibbling on my son’s birthday cake, so yesterday morning I let my kids have it for breakfast.
Lunch that day? Cake and baby carrots.
I saved myself from eating tons of it, and my kids thought I was the coolest mom ever.
One day of cake won’t kill them!
Oh man, I just caved and chopped off a big hunk of my dark baking chocolate. Why couldn’t I have read this two hours ago before I sold my soul? Grr…
What will power! I would have either eaten it or jumped all over it!
I am queen of chucking food that tempts me! My hubby, on the other hand, can go for weeks with such temptations sitting right in front of him. It’s just not fair. :-)
Kudos Kim! Mad props! You are awesome. Just reading this made my mouth water.
Good for you!!
Give it to the girls!
Love the reader who gave you the YouTube link! That’s helpful, see!
All I got is “mad props”, a good chuckle from reading this, and a belly full of cupcakes I baked last night. So, that means I also have a “congrats! Today you are better than me” award for you!
Your self control is far greater than mine. I think I can hear the cake (which may be no more? How did the squirrel like it? calling to me… Oh Tracy… here I am…
I have to leave chocolate cake at the store. No self control.
If you throw it, could you throw it my direction? It sounds delicious. Which is why I’m AMAZED at your will-power. If that were it my house, it would have been LONG gone…
The big question is where did the cake come from? Did it just appear in your fridge one day (hate it when that happens)?
Squirrels don’t deserve yummy cake, squirrels are evil!
My midwife told me to cut down on sugar, and I’ve found it’s much harder to cut down on sugar when you’re actually TRYING to. I don’t have that much normally, but now I open the fridge thinking “okay, no sugar.” And there’s a package of cookies staring at me.
Did the squirrel survive?
Sugar cookies are in the other room calling my name … trying to be good …
I’d be MORE than happy to assist you in devouring, err, I mean, removing the temptation.
Oh, man! I almost forgot to come back to this post – more often than not I get a chance to read posts but not comment right away. Anywhoo…I just wanted to let you know that this post made me LAUGH OUT LOUD. Thank you, thank you, thank you for that.
Isn’t it easier to stop the sufferings just there? Why do you need to prolong them.
Just take thjis “bad-bad” piece and hide it far away from your eyes. In the place where you can’t see it ever. You know. The place between lips.
You’ll never see it again and will keep the mind health.
So is that cake still there?? I’m on catch up hon, starting at the bottom and so looking forward to the read. Hope you’re ok. xx
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