Bye Bye Baffled Twenties – Hello Translucent Thirties!
by Kym on August 21, 2008
I like being thirty. So far it’s been nothing but love and laughter and all sorts of other good stuff. Granted, I’m only two days in, but I’m feeling cautiously optimistic.
We went car shopping last night and on the drive there I did my usual sing-songing with the girls. As the last strains of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star faded away, Emma said, “I had a idea! I’ll tell a story! Once upon a time there was a little girl named Emma, and she stretched her arms way, way out, and she broked the car!”
“Emma? You didn’t break the car, honey. Do you know how to drive?”
Emma laughed and answered, “Silly Mommy! I don’t drive!”
“Well honey, only the person driving can break the car.”
Emma paused to absorb this. “I’m sorry I broke the car, Mommy!”
I sighed a bit. We’re lucky that there have been no injuries or trauma involved in this weekend’s accident, but Emma’s continued apologizing has me a little concerned.
Emma interrupted my thoughts. “I know Mommy! How about you tell us a story?”
“I can’t honey, Mommy needs to concentrate on driving.”
Emma replied in an exasperated tone of voice. “You don’t do it with your hands Mommy, you do it with your mouth.”
I laughed so hard that she joined in and by the time we got to the car lot she’d forgotten to press the issue.
Now car shopping is something that I don’t particularly enjoy. It is rather exciting on one level. Oooooo…something shiny and new, the joy! But there’s too much fear wrapped up in it for me. Fear of buying the wrong vehicle and fear of spending our money foolishly. It’s such an odd feeling to be giddy and terrified all in one moment, but in past car buying situations that stomach churning state of affairs has held constant throughout the process.
Not this time, apparently. I feel strangely calm. I made notes in my handy little notebook last night, taking care to record the pros and cons of all our vehicle options.
This? Is not remotely like me. At all.
I can only give credit to the shifting of decades. A birthday is merely an invisible line we draw to help us comprehend the seemingly linear stretch of time behind and ahead of us. It’s a human convenience. A sign of our need to comprehend or at least quantify our existence. But it has such meaning for us that the marking of a day can have a profound impact on our lives. That’s been the case with me.
My twenties were a difficult time for me. They contained my first date, first kiss (I was a late bloomer) and first love. I was confused and miserable more often than not, and the years stretching ahead of me looked bleakly challenging.
I feel blessed with a sudden clarity. I ponder about all that I need to do and all that I want to do, and I realize that even being starkly realistic about it all, the goals I’ve set for myself are more than achievable. I’ve learned a lot this past year or so, and I feel like it’s all beginning to crystallize.
I hardly know myself now. I used to define myself by my shyness and reserve, my pessimism and despair. I like who I’m becoming and that alone is bizarre to me. Once upon a time, I never thought to like anything about myself. Who is this happier more laughing version of me?
I look forward to spending the next decade finding out.
31 comments
Yay for your 30s! On my next birthday, I’ll be officially halfway through mine. So far they’ve been better than my 20s were–which weren’t half bad.
On a totally random note–something I’ve always wanted to say: I’m so jealous of your thin face! Mine is the first place fat goes and the last place to leave. If I’m thin (rare moments–it’s happened a couple of times) you can’t tell by a headshot. Still have a fat face. And if I really am fat (happened a few too many times), a headshot makes me look like a beached whale. Lovely. I’d kill for a jawline and cheekbones like yours.
by Annette Lyon on August 21, 2008 at 5:47 pm. #
“…A birthday is merely an invisible line we draw to help us comprehend the seemingly linear stretch of time behind and ahead of us. It’s a human convenience. A sign of our need to comprehend or at least quantify our existence…”
Gorgeous.
by Melanie J on August 21, 2008 at 6:16 pm. #
Man, thirty seems so old!
Oops, did I just say that aloud? ;)
I’ll be there soon enough.
by Summer on August 21, 2008 at 6:21 pm. #
I second melanie j – holy cow you have a way with words lady – love that line!
by heather of the EO on August 21, 2008 at 6:37 pm. #
Yep, I’m with Melane and Heather, that was one fabulous line my sweet. Yay for bing in our thirties. :D
by Jo Beaufoix on August 21, 2008 at 6:42 pm. #
Yay for thirties (woah, I never thought I’d say that…). Yay for shiny new cars! It pains me to look at my ratty old minivan. Maybe you could loan me a friend who could break it for me?
By the way, everyone’s now quoted the line I was going to quote. Gorgeously written, of course. I mean, this is YOU we’re talking about! And not just YOU, but THIRTY-YEAR-OLD YOU! Who is, apparently, slightly cooler than the 29-year-old you that I knew.
Wow, who knew that was even POSSIBLE? :-D
by Brillig on August 21, 2008 at 7:26 pm. #
Oh, to go back to thirties!
But I’ll tell ya, it even gets better from there. Believe it or not!!
by JustRandi on August 21, 2008 at 7:40 pm. #
I love that you have “come out of your shell” and have decided that when I grow up (maybe this is when I turn 30, too?) I want to be like you. :-)
by Beth on August 21, 2008 at 7:50 pm. #
I can only hope my 40′s bring what your 30′s have brought you. I still feel like a kid who needs an adult by them at all times. =)
Can’t wait to hear about what car you guys end up getting. Personally, I think you’d look great in a Corvette. But then, they probably don’t make those with car seat adapters, do they?
by Inkling on August 21, 2008 at 7:52 pm. #
I’m just starting into my thrities… and I must admit, so far, I have no complaints. Well, I have complaints, but they aren’t directly related to being in my 30′s :)
by Melissa on August 21, 2008 at 8:02 pm. #
I had my first kiss when I was 20. Nice to know I’m not the only one!
by Memarie Lane on August 21, 2008 at 8:10 pm. #
My mom always said that the 30′s are the best decade. You’re not constantly comparing yourself to everyone else like you did in your 20′s (though I still do that) and you no longer insist you should look like a teenager, but you’re not falling apart yet either :-) I’ve really liked my 30′s. I feel like I really have done a thing or two, learned a thing or two, and yet there is still so much to be done.
by Josi on August 21, 2008 at 8:15 pm. #
Wonderful post. I think you’re going to have a great decade. :)
Also, if I may put my two cents in. Toyota Siennas are great, safe, family cars. The integrity of the car is probably what saved my mom’s life when she got hit a few years back. It totalled the car, but she and my brother were both safe (I’m trying to be positive, even though I’m still livid about the accident)…but my parents were so please with the safety, they went and bought the new model of the Sienna. I know you mentioned wanting a car to grow into. Just thought I’d put it out there. I’ll stop rambling on. :)
by Jaina on August 21, 2008 at 8:42 pm. #
Brilliant insight yet again … I am glad that is following you into your 30′s :) !!
So far I have really enjoyed this new decade.
Good luck with the car shopping … what you are considering?
by An Ordinary Mom on August 21, 2008 at 8:47 pm. #
Ooohh!! May this relaxed persona continue!
Good luck with car shopping. It can be overwhelming!
by Tracey on August 21, 2008 at 10:19 pm. #
30′s are great. You feel good body and soul. Then comes the 40′s. Your soul feels really good, but the body starts to do weird things.
My birthday is approaching. I won’t hit the 50 this time around. But I’ll keep you updated.
Be good to your body now and always. It will thank you over and over again.
Have a great decade.
by Jan on August 21, 2008 at 11:22 pm. #
I hope that when I’m 30 and all grown up, I’m as sound minded as you appear to be!
Way to keep your cool Kimmy!
(I can’t help it, that pops out every now and then… I even tried to erase it, and then wrote it again.)
I love reading your blogs. They are so exquisitely written.
Thank you.
by Abra on August 22, 2008 at 1:32 am. #
Welcome to your 30s. I’ve found them to be quite fabulous.
by Lisa Milton on August 22, 2008 at 2:48 am. #
…it’s your evil twin, Bimkerly, and she’s laughing because she’s plotting to take over the world! BEWARE!
Happy thirties. I’m older than you! (See if you can catch up!)
by wynne on August 22, 2008 at 5:10 am. #
Beautifully written.
by razzler on August 22, 2008 at 12:23 pm. #
Yay for the 30′s!! You’re gonna love em.
by Tonya on August 22, 2008 at 2:23 pm. #
I have the same fear with car shopping – which we’re also in the middle of – which is also a result of an accident – which also is a result of a distracted driver (not me). Anyhooo, if money wasn’t an issue, of course there’d be no fear. But it’s a big purchase for most of us.
by Jennie C. on August 22, 2008 at 3:04 pm. #
Yay thirties! I’ll be joining you in September!
by Tirzah on August 22, 2008 at 4:26 pm. #
the thirties are quite nice, aren’t they? clarified perspective, a mellowing of the self-centeredness, plus an enlarged sense of humor–that last bit mostly out of necessity, methinks.
may the rest of this decade be just as kind to you.
by Nic on August 22, 2008 at 4:58 pm. #
By the way, love the new layout!
by The Mama's on August 22, 2008 at 5:48 pm. #
Happy 30′s. And they will only get better.
by Eowyn on August 22, 2008 at 7:02 pm. #
Happy birthday, happy car shopping too.
I am glad you liked the lotion. I hoped it was “you”.
I am giving away a home scent collection over at http://allieparkersthoughts.blogspot.com/ AND this time I am shipping to Canada if the winner lives there. Maybe you could get an oil warmer to go with your yummy lotion.
by Sandra on August 22, 2008 at 9:12 pm. #
Look what happens when I don’t check in for a week…you have a birthday and go on a vacation and have a traumatic experience. I feel like I missed so much! And I feel like a heel for missing your birthday. I love my birthday and I love it when my birthday is recognized, so I’m sooo sorry that I missed yours. And I’m sorry to hear about the accident, but ever so grateful that your girls are ok.
I love your perspective on what a birthday is and the kind of person you are becoming!
Happy Birthday!!!
by mindyluwho on August 22, 2008 at 10:34 pm. #
Birthday Girrrrrl!
We were in a car accident several years ago. Every week when we pass the curve where it happened, the kids STILL have to say something about it. I’d rather forget the trauma, but there is something about talking it through that seems to help them….
by Luisa Perkins on August 22, 2008 at 10:46 pm. #
i was laughing really hard because i had a mental image (cuz i’m so tired) of you driving the car with your mouth. i knew that couldn’t be right, but still.
and then summer knocked the funny right out of me with that comment about 30ness. i am thirty-bloody-seven and it is very very youNG!!!
no, really!
by holly on August 22, 2008 at 11:39 pm. #
yay for 30′s….only a few weeks and I get to join you….and, by the way, I’m convinced that we’ll get to spend at the very least, one more evening celebrating before we departe on our cross-country journey. (by the way, you sure did make me feel loved on your birthday—funny that the birthday girl would give such a lovely gift!)
xoxo
by Jenn on August 23, 2008 at 3:09 pm. #