Temporary? Insanity

I’ve tried, I really have. Years of being the shy and boring brown haired, brown eyed girl took their toll and awhile back I decided I wanted to be interesting. Having a natural tendency towards paranoid delusions seemed such a gift in light of that, but as the title of this post implies, I’m too lazy to make use of my talent.

Typical Kim. I don’t practice the piano or sing much either. I’ll grudgingly admit that I have a few wee talents knocking about but I’m scared to nurture them. Fame is a fickle mistress, don’t'cha know.

And really, of all my (deeply) hidden talents, paranoia is probably the spiffiest. Seriously, I have a real knack for it. I often entertain myself by mulling over conspiracy theories I’m too apathetic to research or start facebook groups about. Every night I see a mental movie of all the horrors that might take place in the dark (it always looks like a 1950′s horror flick for some reason), and yet I don’t bother to check the locks on all the doors and windows. Despite being half certain that I’ll be murdered in my bed some night, I never actually do anything to prevent it.

Such a shame. I could be so INTERESTING if I did.

Even as a child signs of my raw, natural talent would have been apparent, but for the most part lay untapped in the vast emptiness that was my adolescent mind. I had a long term fear that someone was peeking in my bedroom window at night. There was a sort of ledge underneath and a trellis that could be climbed up to reach it. Rather than, I don’t know, close the darn blinds, I would wear my prettiest nightie and do my hair before bed each night. Hey, if some pervert was going to be watching me I was going to look GOOD.

And don’t even try to tell me how horrifying and chilling the book 1984 was. Far from being shocked my initial reaction was to shrug and say I’d imagined worse. Because I HAD. Frequently even.

So what’s the point of recording this strange quirk of mine? Amusement? So my children know how lucky they are if they don’t take after Mommy?

Nah. I just wanted you to know that, boring as I may seem, on the inside I am FASCINATING.

Off to visit the inlaws. Yay! I love Neil’s family (don’t hate) and have been looking forward to this hugely. See you on the other side of the weekend!