And it came to pass in the year of the Vancouver hosted Olympics, that a certain woman of great size did decide to reduce herself. Yea, even to bring about the removal of five and fifty pounds from her beleagured frame.
Her efforts were valiant, if sometimes misguided, and marvelous was her progress. Pop, she did shun. Potato chips she did shun. Yea, even the sweet succulence of scrumptious cookies did she shun.
But then cameth the cream[...]
